19 March 2010

An Elegant Argument, Simplified.
by skitch
03/19/2010, 3:17 AM #

Perhaps some of you have trouble following the subtle (read "torturous and convoluted") arguments of the more colorful members of our zany cast of characters. I've asked my good friend Dave Goldberg (Rube Goldberg's half-Jewish half-brother) to diagram a sample argument to help clarify things. I'm not entirely certain he was the right guy to ask...

Passing Jew (A) casts shadow on photovoltaic cell (B) interrupting current to electromagnet (C) holding ironic weight (D). Weight falls on seesaw (E) flinging can of paint (F) onto dreaming bird (G), startling her awake and causing her to drop fecal matter (H) on picture of Jerzy Kosinski (I). Picture topples and falls on scissors (J) cutting string allowing pin (K) to pop balloon (L). Alarmed by the sudden noise, cuddly little lamb (M) runs away, pulling crossbow trigger (N) and firing bolt into copyright notice. Copyright symbol (O) is dislodged and falls on painted bird who (finally fed up with the serial indignities) flies to new perch on dynamite plunger (P) where she begins loudly scolding all passersby. Plunger is pushed down by her weight causing explosion that collapses twin towers (Q).

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